Author Topic: I want to be an illegal alien  (Read 2085 times)

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I want to be an illegal alien
« on: August 07, 2006, 06:48:43 PM »
 



>
> The Honorable Paul S. Sarbanes
> 309 Hart Senate Office Building
> Washington DC, 20510
>
>
> Dear Senator Sarbanes,
>
>
> As a native Marylander and excellent customer of the Internal Revenue
> Service, I am writing to ask for your assistance. I have contacted the
> Immigration and Naturalization Service in an effort to determine the
> process
> for becoming an illegal alien and they referred me to you.
>
> My reasons for wishing to change my status from U.S. Citizen to illegal
> alien stem from the bill which was recently passed by the Senate and for
>
> which you voted. If my understanding of this bills' provisions is
> accurate,
> as an illegal alien who has been in the United States for five years,
> what I
> need to do to become a citizen is to pay a $2,000 fine and income taxes
> for
> three of the last five years.
>
> I know a good deal when I see one and I am anxious to get the process
> started before everyone figures it out. Simply put, those of us who have
>
> been here legally have had to pay taxes every year so I'm excited about
> the
> prospect of avoiding two years of the last five years taxes in return
> for
> paying a $2,000 fine. Is there any way that I can apply to be illegal
> retroactively? This would yield an excellent return for me and my family
>
> because we paid heavy taxes in 2004 and 2005 and I estimated a gross
> savings
> approximating $72,000. After the fine this would yield me a net savings
> of
> $70,000.
>
> In addition, I would reap the other benefits of being an illegal alien
> such
> as free healthcare, avoidance of paying Social Security taxes, buying
> automobile insurance, serving on jury panels, etc.
>
> If you would provide me with an outline of the process to become illegal
>
> (retroactively if possible) and copies of the necessary forms, would be
> most
> appreciative. Thank you for your assistance.
>
> Your Loyal Constituent,
>
> Pete McGlaughlin
>
>
>